The past several weeks have been full of reflection and self-awareness. This process is not sunshine and rainbows. It’s required me to get real with the icky parts of myself–the ways I stood in my own way and the self-destructive tendencies I had. I’m writing that sentence in the past tense because I’m choosing not to identify with those thoughts and actions anymore.

Whether we want to acknowledge it or not, we all have this “gunk” lingering beneath our outward facades. Anyone who leads you to believe otherwise is lying. No one is perfect, even if we’d like to be. Bringing awareness to our subconscious thoughts and actions is crucial for rewriting these patterns and creating a life of infinite possibilities. Here I will share my “gunk” with you in the hopes that more people will learn from this process.

As we go through life, typically the demands on our time and energy increase. You get married, start a family, and raise kids. Maybe you start a business, advance or change your career, buy a house, take on a side hustle, care for aging parents or friends…the list goes on. Life doesn’t get easier, however we get stronger and more resilient. Through the hard times, we learn about ourselves and many of us take solace knowing that God is by our side.

The pivotal moments for me revolve around growing our family and growing my business. I love both the roles of mom and entrepreneur so much, however, they bring my greatest flaws to the surface: the perfectionism, the hustle, the “doing” and the “doing it all,” the pride, and the desire to control.

The most well-intentioned callings bring our “gunk” to the surface and we have a choice: ignore it and push onward, or, acknowledge it and work through it. Ignoring leads to the metaphorical junk drawer of thoughts and emotions getting overloaded until you can’t push onward anymore. Acknowledging it feels vulnerable, and working through it feels icky. However, it allows for a multitude of freedoms on the other side.

Many of our limiting beliefs were established during childhood and often, we operate out of these same mind traps without even realizing it in the name of self-preservation. They have become subconscious responses that we don’t even recognize until we are in deep and it comes to our conscious awareness. 

Want to know the good news? Our old patterns can be rewritten. But it requires us to do the work of acknowledging it and working through it. We are not perfect, so we will mess up. Don’t strive for perfection because you will not achieve it. This is all part of learning how to act in your values, get out of your own way, trust that there is a higher power looking out for you, and holding your best intentions at heart. This letting go of control feels scary and uncomfortable. We try to control because of a fear of the unknown. But what if the unknown is infinitely better than your known, familiar reality? 

Being a wife and mom as well as leading my business are my two biggest callings in life. I firmly believe that God put me on this earth to mother my boys and positively affect the lives of my clients. Here’s how I’m shifting my narrative:

• I can take pride in my work without falling into the trap of self-destructive pride.
• I can want to do things well without falling into the trap of perfectionism. 
• I can desire a positive outcome without falling into the trap of control.
• I can take risks without falling into the trap of fear. 

I invite you to ask yourself: What are your thoughts telling you each day? Are you telling yourself things that build you up or tear you down?

In the world of quantum physics, it’s accepted that there are an infinite number of possibilities and outcomes already in existence, they just need to be observed to come into reality. The way to manifest the version of yourself that you want to live with every single day is to focus your thoughts on that person, meditate and pray for that version of yourself, and not let a thought go by that contradicts the version of yourself that you want to become.

I hope and pray that you experience all the abundance available to you. Know that I’m walking alongside you on this journey. I’ll mess up, and you will too, but the key is to always learn from it. If you have any thoughts, questions, or comments I’d love to hear from you. Shoot me an email and we can chat.